Thursday, June 21, 2012

Three years ago today

Three year ago today I was supposed to hold my newborn son.  Funny thing is I didnt even realize it until a few minutes ago that is was the 21st.  I feel horribly guilty about it.  Now it's all I can think about and I still have half a day's worth of work left to do.   So many things have happened in the last month, mostly not great.  Dustin and I are just overwhelmed trying figure everything out from hospital bills to bedtime schedules.  Getting dinner on the table for the kids on time and keeping the house in a respectable condition has been a challenge.  When Micah was in the hospital a month ago his routine got so screwed up that he started waking up two times a night again and is just now starting to sleep through the night again.  I still can't believe that I forgot about Keller's due date though...I think he would understand, I know he is around and watches over us so he knows the chaos we deal with on a daily basis :)  I wish he was here to play with his sisters and brother, he would fit right in.   Johanna asks me about him sometimes and I tell her that he is her brother who went to heaven.  So far she seems satisfied with that answer.

BUT I dont want it to seem that we are unhappy. We are just simply tired and sometimes overwhelmed. We love our kids an wouldn't trade them for the world. They are happy which is all that matters. Johanna is doing great at school, doing Kindergarten work and beyond. Emery is loving daycare at Tiffany's and talking up a storm I think she uses better grammar than I do sometimes. Micah is growing and growing. He was sick this last week with hand foot mouth disease that he picked up at daycare. I know that will happen and there is nothing anyone can do about it but I hate seeing my babies sick. We took him to the Dr and he weighed in at a whopping 22.7 lbs at 8.5 months old. He is a tank! but we love it that way. He is a happy smiley baby. He still has a touch of reflux and doesn't like food though. You would know that looking at him, that's for sure. He loves his milk but just doesnt care for solids. He WILL eat the little puff snacks... i think he just wants to feed himself!

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